Were you afraid of the snaps? I sure was. You know how some McDonalds and other fast-food places had those large structures, usually referred to as "big toys" in which kids would take off their shoes, and climb around inside? Well I enjoyed enjoyed playing in these, and of course I had my favorite "big toy" at a particular fast-food place.
Nevertheless, there was always one part of any big toy that I would avoid: the slides. Why do you think that would be? Maybe it was too dark? No I didn't mind that. Too fast? I loved the speed! It was the snaps. That's what I called it, anyway. It was really just static electricity shocking me as I slid down the slide; touching those strange round-stub metal things (that most likely held the spherical structure together) would never cease to electrocute me.
The sudden shocks didn't hurt too much (even then), but it was simply anticipating the shock that got me on edge. It drove me wild! There was always tension when I went down the slide, and then when one of those round metal things shocked me, YEOW! I would jump. Sliding on the slides just became too exhausting of a feat, and although some slides were better than others (the purple one was always the worst) I could not use a slide on a big toy.
Of course by the time I'd outgrown that, I was too old to play in the McDonald's Playplaces. At first I was dissapointed, but a closer, and slightly more mature look had me pay more attention to the idea of many small children with fry-stained, greesey fingers and messey faces climbing in an area which was probably not cleaned very often. After that I wondered how it made sense to put fast-food and phsical education together. I guess the snaps are just misunderstood, because in fact they were steering me in the right direction after all. What unsung heroes those snaps are!
I too have always feared the dreadful snaps. They are a force truly terrible, a subtle evil, a reminder of the forces of darkness at work even in so unassuming a place as the McDonalds big toy. The horror!
ReplyDeleteBut by norski! I am shocked and truly saddened to see that you have referred to them as "heroes"! We must be more careful when dealing with as malicious a force as this! For if we once give in to their seductive power, we shall never escape! Arm yourself! Enough of this all-too-tolerant prittle-prattle! Show them as they really are, and watch the world draw back in utter revulsion! Only then shall truth be known! It is only then that good shall prevail! It is only then that the dreadful malice of the snaps shall be cast back into the shadow from whence it came!!
~Knute